I always wondered why mothers’ had such a reputation for making their children feel guilty. And now I think I know why. Because you feel guilty ALL the freaking time. After a while it probably becomes second nature and eventually you just become good at it. I’m assuming anyway. I’m not actually at that point yet. I’m at the ALL the freaking time part. For example:

I let her eat a chocolate cupcake before lunch. Actually, if you read my blog, you are probably wondering if I give her anything except chocolate.

And it was good!

The Rationaliser: It’s not so bad, there was cacao powder in it

The Guilty Conscience: And refined sugar, you’re totally reaching. I’m not even going to dignify that.

Yet another example:

The munchkin watching TV (or feasting her eyes on ‘kiddy heroin’ – phrase stolen from @flyingfish1970 -it’s ok we’re related it’s highly unlikely she’ll sue)

The Rationaliser: I had to work. YOU try working on the computer with her dragging on your pant leg.

The Guilty Conscience: She’s playing with crayons, if you’d turned off the TV she would have most likely continued playing and not had that creepy blank stare on her face. And not to be picky, but you’re hardly working, you’re taking photos. GOOD LORD! What is THAT?! In the second one she’s eating chocolate AND watching TV. If you can’t see what’s wrong with that, I can’t help you.

And finally, the nail in the coffin

The Rationaliser: Giving her a bottle during the day helps her get to sleep.

The Guilty Conscience: Not even you believe that. It helps her get to sleep quicker and with less help from you. This is totally selfish on your part. Oh I give up, somebody hand ME a bottle.